Why not???

I can’t write too well but that has never stopped me from thinking I write some great stuff. 

In my mind I am almost certain that I won’t live long enough to tell my daughter, a little over 2 years now, all the things I want to tell her or even if I live that long I am sure she will not want to listen to some old man losing his mind.

So on this night when she is sleeping peacefully truly believing her dad is a hero there are a few things I want get off my heart.

·      I have been the best dad I can, I am sure that as you grow up you will find that your friend’s dads are a lot cooler/ better than me. Please remember that I did the best I could. I am sorry if I didn’t live up to your expectations.

·      No matter what you do you will ALWAYS be the second best thing that happened to me, the first being your mom coming into my life.

·      .Yes I know I talk too much, I am a story teller and long after I am gone I hope to stay alive in your stories.

·      There will be a time when we have a really bad showdown and we refuse to talk to each other, remember I am hurting a hundred times worse than you are for being the ASS&%**% that I was and I am really want to walk up to you give you a hug.

·      At some point not too far away you are going to leave home and that is the day I truly dread.

·      It doesn’t matter who you are going to marry, I will always think you could have done better so don’t listen to what I have to say.

·      No matter what you do I will ALWAYS be very, very, very proud of who you are and I will ALWAYS be there for you. Nothing else can bring me the joy that you do.

·      Irrespective of what I say, I have NO expectations of you. Not because you are not capable, but because I am not smart enough to know what you are interested in. Life is short; please live your own life.

·      Help those who are lesser fortunate than you, it is worth it and no matter how much money you make remember it will never be enough.

·      Last but not least, don’t trust Facebook, Twitter is totally worth it.

I write for myself (mostly) but today I write for you!!! Smile coz you are the BEST!!!!

Been a while..

It has been a really really long time since my last entry. For reasons mysterious and mostly unimportant I have decided to start posting again.

Although there have been some events of interest,for me, in the last 18 months or so, I am going to just list a few of favourite quotes for startes. I hope to put up material covering diverse topics in the near future.

Let me know which of these you like:

1. The average person thinks he isn't. - Father Larry Lorenzoni

2. Nature has been for me, for as long as I remember a source of solace, inspiration, adventure, and delight; a home, a teacher, a companion. - Lorraine Anderson

3. It's a shallow life that doesn't give a person a few scars. - Garrison Keillor

4. Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired. - Jules Renard

5. Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen – Albert Einstien

6. When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other. - Eric Hoffer

7. Don't look for more honor than your learning merits. - Jewish Proverb

8. I can resist anything but temptation. - Oscar Wilde

9. It's better to be a company than to work for a company. - Jim Coudal

10. The cost of living is going up and the chance of living is going down. - Flip Wilson

11. Amusement is the happiness of those who cannot think. - Alexander Pope

12. Some people will never learn anything because they understand everything too soon. - Alexander Pope

13. Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed. - Alexander Pope

14. The visionary lies to himself, the liar only to others. - Friedrich Nietzsche

15. A man thinks that by mouthing hard words he understands hard things. - Herman Melville

16. I have seen the future and it doesn't work. - Robert Fulford

17. We are always the same age inside. - Gertrude Stein

18. My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me. - Benjamin Disraeli (1804 - 1881)

19. Rich gifts wax poor when givers prove unkind. - William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616), Hamlet

20. Hold a true friend with both hands. - Nigerian Proverb

21. While there's life, there's hope. - Cicero (106 BC - 43 BC)

22. There smites nothing so sharp, nor smelleth so sour as shame. - William Langland

23. When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained. - Mark Twain

24. Man is distinguished from all other creatures by the faculty of laughter. - Joseph Addison

25. But in the end one needs more courage to live than to kill himself. - Albert Camus

26. You're never too old to become younger. - Mae West

27. Where all think alike, no one thinks very much. - Walter Lippmann

28. Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch. - W. C. Fields

29. I never know how much of what I say is true. - Bette Midler

30. Reality is nothing but a collective hunch. - Jane Wagner

31. Not by wrath does one kill, but by laughter. - Friedrich Nietzsche

32. We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves. - Francois de La Rochefoucauld

33. It is the part of a good shepherd to shear his flock, not to skin it. - Latin Proverb

34. Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much. - Oscar Wilde

35. Every artist was first an amateur. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

36. Whenever you have an efficient government you have a dictatorship. - Harry S Truman

37. The unspoken word never does harm. – Kossuth

38. "God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh." – Voltaire

39. Take everything you like seriously, except yourselves. - Rudyard Kipling

40. Everyone is a prisoner of his own experiences. No one can eliminate prejudices - just recognize them. - Edward R. Murrow

41. Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop. – Ovid

42. When your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt. - Henry J. Kaiser

43. Our imagination is the only limit to what we can hope to have in the future. - Charles F. Kettering

44. Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy. - Groucho Marx

45. Sometimes the clearest mirrors come from those who are outside looking in. - Jennifer Neal

46. Every increased possession loads us with new weariness. - John Ruskin

47. Never forget what a man says to you when he is angry. - Henry Ward Beecher

48. Realize deeply that the present moment is all you ever have. - Eckhart Tolle

49. Each of us bears his own Hell. – Virgil

50. What's money? A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do. - Bob Dylan

Wikipedia

I came across a quote in Wikipedia, a little while ago, that goes:

“Imagine a world in which every single person on the planet is given free access to the sum of all human knowledge”

The quote is attributed to Jimmy Wales who is the co-founder or, as some people believe, the founder of Wikipedia.

I want you to pause here for a moment and read the quote again and reflect on the intensity of that dream. I can only pray for such an utopian scenario and I sincerely hope that in our lifetimes we see a world where access to information on any topic is not merely a privilege for an exclusive few.

In my opinion, Wikipedia is without doubt the best thing that happened to us in the last couple of decades. The reason I say that is because it makes me believe that we somewhere within us we all have a selfless streak. I love the fact that people have taken so much time out of their daily lives to add and edit the content that makes Wikipedia and it must have been the easiest thing for the co founders of Wikipedia to make modify the business model to generate revenues rather than rely solely on donations by patrons. It is brilliant that the co founders have resisted the urge to make their millions and it is even more amazing that scores of people have resisted the urge to horde information and have posted whatever they know so it can be accessed by who so ever pleases.

The thought of charging to access Wiki is truly scary. The minute you begin to associate a fee, however small it may be, for a service it automatically begins denying a large number of people access simply because financial conditions vary vastly across the globe. Imagine a small kid in some impoverished corner of the globe with access to the computer and the internet at school or at an NGO or where ever else and being able to access information on any topic for no charge. I want you to reflect on the number of lives that have been affected or changed by Wikipedia.

I agree this sounds like an advertisement for Wiki and I may be exaggerating its role and the importance. If you think there is some other knowledge sharing practice that comes close to the reach, number and quality of Wiki’s articles please let me know and I will gladly do a piece on that as well.

I think that everyone taking an active part in adding to Wikipedia’s content i.e. the people who donate to keep it a free site, the millions who contribute to its content and the co founders are leading by example and are in the right direction to help create a world where, in the words of Jimmy Wales, every single person on the planet has free access to the sum of all human knowledge. I profusely thank all of you who have helped create and sustain Wiki. It sure has changed the way I look for information.

Hurrayyyyy!!!!!!!!

What a great New Year!!! The recently exposed Satyam Fraud has marked the coming of age of the “True Indian”. I think it is only now that we have truly heralded our arrival to the rest of the world. I am not being sarcastic when I write these comments and please believe me when I say I am absolutely convinced about every word I have written in this paragraph and this post.

Before we carry on any further I would like to add that I am a proud Indian and there is no other place I’d rather be born in and I don’t foresee myself changing my nationality. I love who I am and I think as a race, we are great and resilient people. I also think we are born with some defects that are common to all of us and, for some reason, we all tend to think that we are individually insulated from them when we (including me) are soaking in them.

First, our biggest negative trait is, in the words of Russell Peters, that we are cheaper than cheap. As disgusting as it sounds we know it is true. The majority of people we know we can, at some point in their life or other, be classified as having been cheap or cheaper than cheap. In the depths of our heart we also know we have been cheap, cheaper and/or cheapest. But we are not going to talk about being cheap today. We are going to talk about our second biggest strength – White Collar Crime. White Collar Crime: for some reason this doesn’t fall into the category of being criminal for the majority of us. We actually take pride in abetting white collar crime and we have no qualms in talking about how we accomplished it at any given opportunity, even if we have to create it.

I can think of numerous occasions where I have been a part of conversations that are centered around topics like how to evade tax, how to conceal black money, how to convert black money into white money, what the going rate of bribe is to get away with drunken driving, how to manipulate company accounts, how to get fake bills while traveling on work, how to have multiple bank accounts so all your financial transactions are not traceable, etc, etc.
In many of these conversations I have given valuable inputs to those seeking them and they have worked. I also have learnt a lot in terms of new ways to go about hoodwinking the government and also some tried and tested ways that are best kept secrets.

I would also like to add that I know it is wrong but I still don’t classify it as a ‘crime’ crime. I wonder why this is. I would like to blame it on genetics. ??I am certain that more than 50 % of the companies listed on our Bombay Stock Exchange are manipulating their books but it is just that Mr. Raju was unfortunate to have gotten caught. I guess he is just not as good as some of the more seasoned players who probably would have called it a day only when they had reached a point of no return when the company was drowning in debt and there was no way out. Mr. Raju has stepped down when his company’s finances are still in the green and they still may have a way out, albeit, a really, really slim ray of hope. I have been listening to people who follow the listed companies and they are of the opinion that this is just the tip of the ice berg and I agree with them. I think that most of the boards are really good at concealing their tracks and I don’t really think that there will be any more such scams that will see the light of day anytime soon.

The point that I am trying to make is that an Indian IT major listed in the BSE, and NYSE whose accounts are being audited by PWC has been able to manipulate their books for more than a decade even though it has an independent board of directors and even though the promoter is a minority stake holder. I think only we Indians can get away with something like this, for so long. What Mr. Raju has done has raped the Indian stock markets and has created ripples in the NYSE. This is the first time that we have had a global impact through white collar crime although it has largely thrived domestically for about a 1000 years now. It is time we got global recognition for the acutely devious mind that we are blessed with and Satyam has just ensured that.

We are definitely a third world country but no one can beat us when it comes to the science of manipulating the system and finding loopholes that can be exploited and sometimes creating loopholes wherever necessary.

Kudos to the brilliant Indian criminal mind!!

Happy New Year

The last couple of weeks of 2008 and the New Year thus far has been a blast for me. I have had a really, really good time catching up with a lot of old friends and making a few new ones. It is always heartening to sit with old friends and to thank god how some things don't change while simultaneously thanking him for some of the changes that have happened.

The 1st of January is always a good time to access changes in yourself and your friends. You can always compare behaviour from either the previous year or in multiples of 1 year. This New Year I thanked god for how little I have changed where it mattered and how much I have changed where it mattered. I mourned the loss of a couple of good relationships that have become victims of circumstance while I thanked God for the new relationships I have made. I am happy that the last 365 days have left me a more skeptical person than I ever was.

Personally the biggest change, for the positive, I have experienced in the last year is the increase in my ability to question aspects I previously thought were absolute truths and my willingness to change my perspective. I have gone from being the brick wall, sometimes for the wrong reasons, to being a more reasonable human being.

The thoughts and emotions that flood ones mind during a time like this are immense. I want to write about a wide range of topics like hope, change, love, despair, success, failure, etc. but I am having such a hard time figuring out what I am going to concentrate on that I have decided not to write about any of them. I also do not want to trivialize the intensity by writing about something insignificant and so I have decided that I am going to end this post here with the lyrics of one of my favourite songs.

I request you to take the time out to read it completely, I promise you it is worth it. It changed the way I look at myself and when I first heard it about 5 years back and it still does.

For your thinking pleasure:

Wear Sunscreen by Baz Lurhman

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of ’97Wear Sunscreen
If I could offer you only one tip for the future,sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience I will dispense this advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth, oh nevermind, you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now, how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked, you are not as fat as you imagine.
Don’t worry about the future, or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing everyday that scares you
Sing
Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss
Don’t waste your time on jealousy, sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind, the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself.
Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults, if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch
Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life, the most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don’t.
Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.
Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t, Maybe you’ll divorce at 40, Maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary What ever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can, don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own
Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.
Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.
Do not read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Brother and sister together we'll make it through Someday a spirit will take you and guide you there I know you've been hurtin, but I've been waitin' to be there for you And I'll be there just helping you out whenever I can

Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings, they are the best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard, Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, Maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.
Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen

Life is calling...... Where are you??????

I was seriously ill last week and was confined to my bed for the better part of 5 days with nothing but my delusions, hallucinations, medication and the occasional cigarette. After a really long time I was revisited the pleasure of lying helpless in bed nurturing different doomsday scenarios and the probability of each one occurring. (Well personally I think God is going to give us a long and hard end considering what we have done with the planet and let us save this discussion for another day.)

These thoughts invariably lead me to dwell on my own mortal existence and that absolutely terrifies me. I am not necessarily worried about my life coming to end but it is the thought of what I am going to leave behind that is rather worrisome. When I reflect on my life so far I can’t single out one noble cause that I have dedicated myself to with the exception of satisfying my own needs and urges, which is far from being classified as a noble cause universally.

Well, realizing that I have led a very primal life so far is one thing but to chart a meaningful path for the remainder of my life is proving a far more daunting task than I thought. Over the last 3 -4 years I have been trying to identify how I am going to affect the world and sadly, for me, I haven’t been able to come up with anything concrete. The way things seem; I am going to be in the same predicament after another 10 – 15 years and will be in the same clueless and frustrated state. I can’t bring myself to believe that my calling in life is to get married and have children and so they can eventually get married and have children and that happiness comes from sacrificing for the sake of children. This is just a responsibility in life that I will fulfill and according to me this cannot classify as a calling.

Imagine a world where everyone lived to fulfill only their responsibilities. It would have truly been a bland and tasteless world for there would be no artists, no poets, no musicians, no authors, no great statesmen, no dreamers, no thinkers, no change. Please don’t get me wrong here, there is absolutely nothing wrong in centering one’s life around trying to provide the best for one’s progeny, I am just saying that I can’t see myself falling in that slot. The part that really depresses me is that with each passing day I seem to be moving closer to being that person.

It is incredible the void this question has created in my life and it scares me that I may never be able to answer this question and I will eventually die without ever knowing what the purpose of my existence was. I often imagine if there is actually a purpose to anyone’s life. What if we are not here as part of a bigger plan? What if we are no better than the animal that seeks to survive and spread its gene pool? What if the rest of my life is a series of interconnected meaningless accidents? What if I become a contented old fool who will look at this literature someday and wonder how I could have been so stupid? What if I become a blind conformist and love the flow? What if I find my calling ?

If any of you have managed to figure out your calling and if you would like to share it, I would love to hear about it. I also would like any tips that would help me figure out how I should try and shape the rest of my earthly existence.

Mumbai Terror Attacks

It is indeed sad that my first blog is about something very sad, ugly and highly effective. I have to write about it as it is troubling my mind and has had me thinking about more questions than I can answer in a lifetime.

I woke up this morning to the unpleasant news of the terror attacks in Mumbai. At the moment there are more than a 100 people dead and close to 600 people wounded and there are two hostage situations that the cops are trying to resolve. I’ve stopped following the news to see what portion of my daily chores I can accomplish before going back to the television but I just can’t seem to get the incident out of my head.

Sitting in front of my computer I can’t help but reflect on the day’s happenings as I digest all I have viewed over the last hour or so about the crisis that is still unfolding in our financial capital. The flood of thoughts and emotions going through my mind at the moment are simply enormous. I am going to pen down a few thoughts as they come to me so I apologize, in advance, for any lack of flow in this piece.

For the benefit of those who may be reading this without being aware of what I am talking about, November26 and 27, 2008 witnessed a terrorist attack on Mumbai. A largely unknown group who call themselves the Deccan Mujahideen and they have orchestrated one of the bloodiest terror attacks witnessed by India the effects of which, in my opinion, are going to be felt for a long time to come. My only hope is that the political leaders do not manipulate this incident to gain political mileage.

I tried to get some information about the Deccan Mujahideen on the internet which proved futile. So I am going to assume they are somehow linked to the better known Indian Mujahideen who are one of the more dangerous terror groups in India.

What bothers me is that how a group, whose name is not even known, has carried out such a large scale attack without being detected. Who is funding these guys for this extremely expensive operation? How have they managed to keep this under wraps for this long?

An operation of this scale, seven attacks simultaneously with overwhelming fire power and with about 4 -5 people in each location must have taken at least 3 -4 months in preparation. More importantly, I am wondering how they managed to recruit people for this operation as it seems like a suicide mission. What did they think they were achieving by this terror attack? What motivated them to lay down their lives leaving behind families that will be tormented for life, should they ever be traced?

I can only imagine the mastermind behind this is either supremely intelligent to conceal the actual plot till the day of its execution or is a shrewd recruiter with exceptional motivational skills or a mixture of both. How is our government going to trace him and how are they going to try and stop him from executing further such terror attacks? How do we remove this partisan thinking? How do we stop further recruitments and further creation of such mindless terror outfits?

Being an Indian, one of the aspects that I’ve always prided myself with was the incredible tolerance of the average Indian. Personally I have visited temples of over 5 religious faiths and have more than 10 very good friends of every faith. I am certain that this is the case with most Indians, at the case with most Indians who have grown up and live in any of the major cities. Why are we losing this cultural dependence we have on each other? Are we going to be happy with a country that is extremely polar? It saddens me to see the rise of organizations that promote extremist views to religion in every major faith. When are we going to see the end of all this and return to living harmoniously?

There are a few questions I have for us, the general peace loving public. Where are we, as a society, going wrong? What acts of ours are helping these terror recruiters prey on people and motivate them to carry out such sinister attacks? Is the economic disparity leading to this or is it our handling of the Kashmir or any other issue? Are the minorities in our country made to feel unsafe? When are we going to speak out to promote brotherhood and condemn the politicians and the media that continues to sensationalize events like this one? How long are we going to treat this merely as a topic of conversation? Are we going to wait to act until the day it actually affects someone close to us? What action can we possibly take even if we wanted to do something about this situation?

We are the ones who taught the world the insurmountable power of non violence. Have we forgotten the very lessons that made us, us? I invite all those who read this to post your comment, however radical. I may not agree with you but I am still interested in seeing the world through your eyes. Please feel free to share any feedback you might have.

I again apologize for the lack of flow in this blog and I leave you guys with the lyrics of a Bob Dylan song that seems most apt for this moment. Just one last thought:

How are you going to change this world?

Blownin In The Wind by Bob Dylan

How many roads must a man walk down

Before you call him a man?

Yes, 'n' how many seas must a white dove sail

Before she sleeps in the sand?

Yes, 'n' how many times must the cannon balls fly

Before they're forever banned?

The answer, my friend,

is blowin' in the wind,

The answer is blowin' in the wind.

How many times must a man look up

Before he can see the sky?

Yes, 'n' how many ears must one man have

Before he can hear people cry?

Yes, 'n' how many deaths will it take till he knows

That too many people have died?

The answer, my friend,

is blowin' in the wind,

The answer is blowin' in the wind.

How many years can a mountain exist

Before it's washed to the sea?

Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist

Before they're allowed to be free?

Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his head,

Pretending he just doesn't see?

The answer, my friend,

is blowin' in the wind,

The answer is blowin' in the wind